This one started with the character of Aga—someone who doesn’t quite operate like others in her world. She thinks differently and is slightly out-of-step because of it. I find something interesting about a character like that, her commitment to her work.

A few years ago, I read an article about the Pacific nation of Tuvalu. This piece of fact emerges in the world of this story—the leadership of Tuvalu announced that it would become the first “digital nation,” in an effort to preserve sovereignty and knowledge of the physical land if the country became uninhabitable due to rising sea levels.

“The Long Goodbye” was a phrase I heard once online in reference to having to take care of elderly, ailing pets. I’ve been caring for a cat with multiple issues for years—he is now eighteen, and every day having to help him relieve himself, groom himself, and move him around has been a bit of a challenge. I think it’s not just an act of love but also of reciprocity—my cat has been there almost all of my adult life and made it better for it.

It was during an AI & Creativity Conference at Stanford that I first heard about Sam Altman’s truly horrifying next endeavor called World Coin. If you haven’t heard of this particular dystopia, it involves an eye-scanning orb that’s being sent to many third world countries to scan the retinas of those who volunteer. In turn they get world-coin credits, basically a new kind of cryptocurrency that will be based on eye-scans, and a horrific way to monetize and create a global surveillance network for the tech overlords.

The inspiration came from my own fascination with the true nature of reality and consciousness. I mean, what is this world we live in? How are seemingly psychic dreams possible? Does consciousness emerge from matter, or is it the other way round? Exploring those questions led me down the rabbit hole where ideas of panpsychism and gnosticism began to intersect in my imagination, and gradually a story started to take shape.

In terms of the idea for this story, the premise just kind of came to me all at once one morning over a coffee. I think it stems from an interest in what potential medical miracles nano-technology may unlock for humanity. And, of course, the inevitable question of who will have the cash flow to partake in said miracles.

What you see is more or less what’s on the page! If it was a longer work I’d obviously know more about her than what got written but all fiction (short fiction especially, IMO) is a little like making a friend on a flight: Generally you only know what they feel like telling you about their life before they stepped on the plane, and that varies from person to person.

I was thinking about power dynamics, and about a Tamsyn Muir story that appeared in Lightspeed in 2017. It’s called “The Magician’s Apprentice,” and it follows a young girl, Cherry, as she learns how to work magic. I was intrigued and distressed by the extreme power imbalance between Cherry and her teacher, a much older man with a secret about where his magic really comes from.

“Discarded God” was partially inspired by a quiet moment when I turned thirty-five last year. I had been reflecting on how much I’d changed from the person I used to be, and how difficult things were in my twenties. I wasn’t out to myself back then, yet alone out to anyone else. I hadn’t realized I could simply use she/they pronouns and embrace being nonbinary. Now? Well, I’m queer as hell and happy with who I am.

This piece began as a challenge I set for myself to tell a story from at least three distinct perspectives. By the time it was finished, it also became a story exploring the different people we become in different relationships. Each section is named after a relationship between Swimmer and someone else in the story. “Son” and “Brother” are both from Swimmer’s perspective, but show who he becomes in his relationship with his father and Boater, who he sees as a sister.