Style-wise, I wanted to establish early on that the reader is in a sort of epic poem being written by the main character, Anisah, and so I specifically tried to reference the style of Beowulf and The Illiad—stories that generally start with the author calling the audience to attention (“Hwæt!”) or invoking a deity (“Sing in me, Muse,” the first line of Robert Fitzgerald’s translation of The Illiad, which I also cribbed for the title).

I blame authors Phoebe Barton and Derek Künsken. One day on Twitter, they were discussing the various irregularities in English plurals: mouses in houses, oxen in boxen, and hooves on the rooves. With that phrase—hooves on the rooves—I caught the feel of the story all at once. Brilliantly cold midwinter, a deer stalking the night. I’m not sure why. It’s possible that hooves on the rooves made me think of reindeer and my subconscious took a Yuletide leap from there.

The story is a pseudo-sequel to a story I published back in 2010 in Interzone called “Saving Diego” about two estranged friends who meet on Gilder Nefan after a decade of being apart. I’ve always loved that setting and have wished to go back to it forever. Also, at the time I wrote “Still You Linger,” I’d been reading a lot of Carl Jung, specifically his book Man and His Symbols, which explores in great detail the symbology of dream imagery and the collective unconscious.

Before having kids, I expected to love them. I did not expect that love to be so cataclysmic and terrible. I did not realize the universe would hand me a door to the meaning of life in the shape of a little person, or that invisible golden wires would extend from her every twitch and blink and pierce my skin and burrow into my core. Before I had Aviva, the worst the universe could do was kill me, and it was planning to get around to that eventually anyway.

I’m interested in philosophical ideas, and science, and using those things to speculate about what might be, or could have been, or about how what is happening now could be different. But at the core of it, I am interested in what it is to be human. There is so much we don’t understand at all about ourselves—even about something as simple as what it is to be a self, an individual, an entity on this planet relating to other humans, to our environment. Why am I me, and aware of being myself?