The inspiration came from my own fascination with the true nature of reality and consciousness. I mean, what is this world we live in? How are seemingly psychic dreams possible? Does consciousness emerge from matter, or is it the other way round? Exploring those questions led me down the rabbit hole where ideas of panpsychism and gnosticism began to intersect in my imagination, and gradually a story started to take shape.

In terms of the idea for this story, the premise just kind of came to me all at once one morning over a coffee. I think it stems from an interest in what potential medical miracles nano-technology may unlock for humanity. And, of course, the inevitable question of who will have the cash flow to partake in said miracles.

What you see is more or less what’s on the page! If it was a longer work I’d obviously know more about her than what got written but all fiction (short fiction especially, IMO) is a little like making a friend on a flight: Generally you only know what they feel like telling you about their life before they stepped on the plane, and that varies from person to person.

I was thinking about power dynamics, and about a Tamsyn Muir story that appeared in Lightspeed in 2017. It’s called “The Magician’s Apprentice,” and it follows a young girl, Cherry, as she learns how to work magic. I was intrigued and distressed by the extreme power imbalance between Cherry and her teacher, a much older man with a secret about where his magic really comes from.

“Discarded God” was partially inspired by a quiet moment when I turned thirty-five last year. I had been reflecting on how much I’d changed from the person I used to be, and how difficult things were in my twenties. I wasn’t out to myself back then, yet alone out to anyone else. I hadn’t realized I could simply use she/they pronouns and embrace being nonbinary. Now? Well, I’m queer as hell and happy with who I am.